At the end of 2021, I began thinking and praying about my word of the year for 2022. One word echoed in my mind over and over again--
I wasn’t sure why this word kept coming to mind, but I decided to go with it. I had no idea just how much this would come to mean in the next year.
Healing is a weird thing. It’s beautiful and it’s also really, really hard. It takes patience and hard work and discipline and sacrifice. It takes time and effort and focus and determination. It takes slowing down and messing up and noticing slow progress. It takes perseverance when sometimes the only thing you want to do is cry yourself to sleep.
If you’re anything like me, in the process of healing, you’ll probably ask yourself a hundred times, “Is this worth it? Is it really worth it?”
I dare you to say yes. I dare you to keep choosing to say yes, over and over again, even when doubt creeps into your mind and you can’t seem to take another step.
Here are a few things that helped me on the journey towards healing this year. I hope they will help you heal, too.
1. Name the brokenness.
This year, I experienced brokenness in my body through a stress fracture. I experienced brokenness in my heart through rejection and fragmented relationships. I experienced brokenness in my mind as trauma tried to take ahold of my peace and replace it with anxiety. I experienced brokenness in my soul and spirit as my eyes were opened to my own pride and bitterness.
In order to move forward with healing, I had to acknowledge these things.
2. Share the brokenness with someone you can trust.
One of the bravest things you can do is to share your brokenness with others. It is scary to be vulnerable, but there is so much freedom and peace that comes from knowing you don’t walk alone.
A word of caution—make wise decisions in who you decide to share this with. We cannot expect others to always respond perfectly, but we should choose people who are safe and trustworthy. We should choose people who are mature and can receive vulnerability with gentleness and grace.
I know that I am blessed to have a few people I can trust to share my brokenness with. They have continued to love me and walk with me as I heal. They encourage me and challenge me along the way. They speak truth and remind me of my worth. I am forever grateful for these people.
I hope you have at least one person who you can turn to and share your brokenness with. If you don’t, I would love to be a listening ear. Seriously, please reach out to me if you need someone to talk to.
3. Bring your brokenness to God.
This is the most important part of the healing journey. It can also be the most difficult.
God wants us to bring all of ourselves to him—especially the broken parts. He wants our tears and our fears and our frustration and all of our emotions.
He sees us, knows us, loves us, and accepts us. Just as we are. All of us. All the time.
And because of that, we can trust that God is good even when life isn’t. God is so good that he wraps his arms around us and sits with us in our pain. He gently reminds us that we are not alone and that he wants to heal our brokenness.
Healing doesn’t always happen exactly when and how we want it to. It often looks like two steps forward, one step back.
For me, healing this year meant taking a step back from running and some of the things I love so that I could heal physical brokenness in my body. Healing meant a lot of tears and words scribbled in my journal. Healing meant having a lot of difficult conversations. Healing meant starting therapy to address some of the deeper brokenness in me. Healing meant a lot of time spent in prayer and a lot of patience as I waited for God to heal in his own timing.
Healing can be such a beautiful journey. It can also be exhausting and scary. If you’re in the process of healing, I encourage you to give yourself lots of grace because it is not an easy journey. But I can promise you, IT IS WORTH IT.
Two steps forward, one step back.
God is healing my heart, my mind, my soul, and my spirit.
He is good, even when life doesn’t feel good.
I am so grateful for this journey. I look forward to 2023 and new opportunities to learn, to grow, and to heal.
Many blessings to all of you as you continue your unique journey. <3