I’ve been feeling kind of confused recently. It feels like my mind is running circles around my heart and everything is just a blur.
At the moment, I have a lot of questions and not many answers. I hate feeling like that. Yet even in my uncertainty, God has been faithful and has continued to reveal his presence to me.
One question that came up today was “Why doesn’t God always bless those who are faithful to him?”
This evening, I had a really good conversation with one of my friends. She has been very intentional about spending time with God and trying to seek him first in everything. We were able to celebrate the joy she is experiencing right now. It is so fun to see how God has blessed someone who has been faithful to him.
As we were talking, I started to feel a little bit of jealousy creep in. As soon as I recognized that, my first thought was “AH! NO! What are you doing here, jealousy? Go away!”
I thought about my feelings a little more. I began to ask myself the “why” questions. Why do I feel jealous of her joy? Why can I not just be totally and completely happy for her?
Then it hit me. I have believed the lie that because I have been “good” and because I have been faithful to God, that I deserve blessings. How conceited is that?! I BELIEVED THAT I DESERVED TO BE BLESSED.
Wow. That hurts to admit. That hurts a lot.
We don’t deserve God’s blessings. We could never earn God’s blessings. So when God chooses to bless someone, it’s something above and beyond. God’s blessings are an act of grace. Grace is not just found in the story of salvation—blessings are undeserved gifts, too.
I NEVER deserve God’s blessings. Never ever in a million years could I even come close to deserving them. That’s because there is no scale of “undeserving” to “almost deserving” or anything like that. Nope. Undeserving is undeserving. Just as no sin is greater than another, no one deserves grace any more than another.
God doesn’t always bless us when we think we deserve it. That makes a lot of sense now, but it still HURTS.
God doesn’t always choose to bless us.
God doesn’t always choose to heal us.
God doesn’t always choose to give us the desires of our heart.
Even if you’re faithful, even if you seek his will, even if you do your very best to follow him, he still may not choose to bless you. AND THAT’S OKAY.
I don’t believe in the prosperity gospel, and I never have. I know that is a lie. But I think I’ve bought into the lie that if I am faithful to God, I deserve to experience his blessings, at least once in a while. At least he should bless me with peace, right? At least he should bless me with fruitful relationships, right? At least he should bless me with people who support me, right?
No. He “shouldn’t” anything.
God gives us grace instead. He gives from the overflowing love in his heart. God is so good. When the sun rises, he is good. When the sun sets, he is good. When the rain falls, he is good. When the storms rage, he is good. When the oceans roar, he is good. When the mountains crumble, he is good. When the earth shakes, he is good. When it seems like all of life is falling apart, he is good. He is good because that is who he is, not what he does. He IS good. He IS grace. He IS love.
So what is our proper response? Gratefulness.
If God chooses to bless you, thank him.
If you’re not experiencing the blessings you asked for, thank him anyways.
Because the truth is, God blesses us all the time, whether we see it or not.
Every day, every moment, every breath is a gift.
We don’t even deserve life itself.
Life is a gift. It is grace. It is an undeserved gift.
God might bless you. And if not, he is still good.
Thank you, Jesus. Thank you for being so good to us, even when we don’t deserve it. We love you.
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