I haven’t shared much of my writing recently. If I’m being honest, I’m still working through some things. It’s hard to share what’s on my heart when I’m still not quite sure what it means. But we all have seasons like that. Seasons of waiting, seasons of growing, seasons of pruning, etc. 

Ecclesiastes 3 says that there is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens. The author lists all the different seasons we go through. If you’re anything like me, sometimes it can be difficult to understand what you’re feeling at any given point in time. If you look through the list in Ecclesiastes 3, it might help you to make sense of the season you’re in right now. 

I don’t have it all figured out. If there’s one sentence I’ve said more than anything else this semester, it’s that I don’t have everything figured out. My close friends can all attest to that! :) I have to keep reminding myself that I’m not supposed to have it all figured out. But I know the God who’s already figured everything out. He knows his plans and he knows my future. He knows my thoughts and he knows my heart even better than I do. He knows what he’s up to. I can rest in the arms of my Heavenly Father, knowing that he knows. He knows it all. 

So here’s to learning to be comfortable
Even amidst the uncertainty

I am learning that I can grow
Even when I don’t know what I’m growing towards

There is a time for everything
And a moment for every emotion

A time to grow and a time to prune
A time to work and a time to rest
A time to run and a time to slow down
A time to fight and a time to surrender
A time to wait and a time to dance
A time to laugh and a time to cry
A time to understand and a time to be uncertain

Here’s to the moments
Where we don’t know what we feel
Here’s to the times
When we don’t feel certain about anything
Here’s to the seasons
Where our thoughts are as cloudy as the skies

Because there is always time for grace
There is always time for love
There is always time for joy
There is always time for peace
There is always time for hope
There is always time for growth
There is always time to be grateful

So here’s to the seasons of uncertainty. Here’s to learning how to be comfortable being uncomfortable. Here’s to the unknown. 

And here’s to being grateful for the little moments in between that bring us joy. Here’s to sweet friends and sunny days and polaroids and barefoot soccer games. Here’s to the little blessings that make life so much sweeter :)

I’ve been thinking a lot about gratefulness recently. But not as something that I need to work on (because I’ve been there done that, right? HAHA). Instead, I’ve been judging others for their lack of gratefulness. Oh, THEY need to be more grateful. THEY have so much to be grateful for. THEY are taking so much for granted. THEY need to remember that the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. 

God convicted me today about my own ungratefulness. He gently exposed those moments in my life where I say things like “I just wish…” or “If only…” or “I can’t wait until…” or “Can we just skip to the part when…” You get the point. 

As I was finally seeing how ungrateful I've been, God whispered this to me: "The grass isn’t always greener on the other side. But the grass is always greener where you’re grateful."

What if we took the time to thank God for every blade of grass? What if we even thanked him for the grass we can’t see but trust is still growing? 

If we were grateful for every blade of grass, we would have to slow WAY down. We would have to open our eyes to see the finer details. We would have to stop rushing around and pause to take in the moment. 

I don’t know about you, but I could use a whole lot more of that. More peace. More rest. More pausing. More listening. More gratefulness. 

Though we might not be able to literally thank God for every single blade of grass, we can start by thanking him for the grass beneath our feet. We can start by being grateful wherever we are. 

Let’s do this together. Let’s be grateful for the ground we’re standing on. Let’s be grateful for the road ahead, overgrown and obscure as it may be. Let’s be grateful for the growth in life, even when it’s slow. 

And let’s see just how much gratitude can change the way we see the world. Let’s see just how much a heart can change with a simple “thank you.” Let’s see just how much greener the world can be when we appreciate every blade of grass. 

Because the grass is always greener where we’re grateful.

I am so proud of who you are becoming. You’ve been through so much in the past year, but you’ve come out so much stronger than before. I don’t know if you see it yet, but I see God doing beautiful things in your life…and that brings me SO MUCH JOY. 

I’m so proud of you for not letting someone else’s words decide your worth. I’m so proud of you for deciding that God, and God alone, is the one who can rule your world. 

And I’m so sorry about the ones who didn’t respect you the way you deserve. I’m so sorry they didn’t listen to the cries of your heart. I’m so sorry they were too selfish to see the beauty in your life. I’m so sorry that they tried to stunt your growth as you were blooming. I may never understand exactly what that felt like, but I am so inspired by your determination to learn, to grow, and to emerge stronger than ever. 

You are beautiful. You are good. You are worthy. You are wanted. You are free. You are loved. 

And I am so proud of you :)

Lord, your love is an endless mountain. I climb higher and higher but I’ll never reach the top. Yet I won’t be frustrated because your love is not an achievement. It’s not an end goal. It’s all about the journey. I will wait on you and I will keep climbing higher and higher, finding light around the bend and joy at every corner. 

As I climb up the mountain, there is so much joy and love and peace. Yet this peace is not because of the place I’m in, but rather the presence I’m in. And I carry that presence with me everywhere I go. Your presence follows me down the mountain and along winding roads. Your presence follows me on city streets and under bright lights. Your presence is always in me, therefore I always have that mountaintop kind of peace inside of me. I need only to pause and rest in your presence to receive it. 

I will wait on you. I will keep seeking you and your love for as long as I live. I will wait on you. And as I wait, I will praise you. I will praise you for every moment in this blessed life that you’ve given me. I will praise you for your goodness. I will praise you for the challenges. I will praise you for your love and when I fall down, I will praise you for picking me back up again. 

Jesus, THANK YOU. Thank you for the waiting. Thank you for your presence. Thank you for this endless mountain of your love. May I never grow tired of climbing it.

There will be days when you’ll feel uninspired and unmotivated. Like your brain is running at a thousand miles an hour but it’s not going anywhere. Like all your thoughts are a jumbled mess and you can’t seem to make sense of any of it. Like the emotions are piled up inside but you can’t find the words to describe any of it. Like you know exactly what you need to do but you have absolutely no idea how to do it. 

There will be days when it feels like you’re walking in a dark forest, all alone. There will be days when you feel like giving up. There will be days when you would do anything just to escape. There will be days when you’re scared out of your mind for no reason at all. There will be days when you cry and cry and you can’t stop, and days that you need to cry but just can’t. There will be days when this world seems like the cruelest place and you can’t seem to find a single spark of good anywhere. 

It’s what you do on those days that matters most. 

Weep, mourn, grieve, destroy some paper, feel it all, do whatever you need to. Then walk it off, go on a run, lift some weights, and clear your head. Stop pushing it down and let that anger and frustration and confusion boil up inside of you. Then pour your heart out and release it all. Release the pressure. Release your need for perfection. Release control and simply BREATHE. Breathe in truth and breathe out light. Feel the peace that comes with surrender. Let your heart heal as you move on. 

And whatever you do, don’t give up. Keep going. Keep fighting. Come back stronger than before. Be fortified with the strength that comes from overcoming a challenge. Run forward with a renewed sense of passion and fervor for life. Learn to live and live to learn and love to learn and learn to love again. Again and again and again. 

And trust me, it will get better. Those dark days you face will soon be met by the rising sun. Hope will return. Joy will be renewed. Love will come back for you. You’re gonna be okay. 

You’re not alone. I’ve been there too. Things will get better and you will be okay. Trust me. In the meantime, I’m cheering you on. You got this. You TOTALLY got this.

Pour out your heart. Let the light in. Let him meet you where you are. 

And let his love transform the way you live. Share it with others. Give others the same grace you have received. Allow others the same freedom to breathe. Love well and love deeply and love without looking back. 

Cherish these moments. Pause to appreciate the little things. A bird on a tree. The gentle breeze. The afternoon sun. A cool morning run. The tiny grains of sand and the wrinkles in your hand. The chorus of the universe singing praises to the one who made it all. 

Let your gratitude change your mindset. Let challenges become opportunities. Let the awkward moments be what they are. Trust that this is all part of his plan. 

He has a purpose. His will is good. And he’s holding you in his hand. He loves you and he wants the best for you. 

So pour out your heart. Allow yourself to be filled up by his love and to overflow with grace and compassion. Speak gentle truths and bright encouragement. Let joy and peace be the song that you sing. 

And do this all for the glory of our king. To him who first poured his heart out for you. He loves you more than you will ever understand.

You placed the stars up in the sky
You raised the mountains way up high

You placed the ground under my feet
You listen to every heartbeat

You paint the colors of a sunset
You know the hairs on my head

You dug the depths of the ocean
You give freedom to emotion

You speak truth through a whisper
You shake the whole earth with thunder

You set the wildfires ablaze
You soften hearts with your gaze

You are solid as a rock
You are graceful as a hawk

You are gentle and you are kind
You are strong and you are wise

You are all these things
You are my everything

And still I can’t see
Why you choose to love me

I’ll never understand
The details of your plan

And I know I cannot earn
This grace I don’t deserve

Yet you pour your blessings out
I still don’t understand how

How your grace and love for me
Reaches far and wide and deep

It covers all my sin and shame
It takes away the pain and blame

You’ve washed me clean
In your eyes, I am free

Free to laugh and dance and cry
Free to marvel and wonder why

As I stand in utter awe
Of this beautiful love song

Your words are a melody
That makes my bitter heart sweet

For everything we’ve been through
All I can say is thank you

Thank you for loving, for choosing
For seeing and for proving

That your love for us
Is completely boundless

I could go on and on and on and on
And still I’d sing an empty song

For I can never do justice
To how much you love us

There are not enough words on a page
Not enough lights on a stage

To honor you the way you deserve
So instead, I promise to serve

Your purpose, your kingdom, your will, your way
I’ll let my actions and what I say

Be a chorus that praises your name
And tells the world of your fame

Be the light in me
And let others see

This joy, this peace, this love
Only comes from above

This life I live
Is the good you give

And I am only free
Because of Christ in me

Look up
Look up in the night sky
See the stars there? 
I see them too

They connect us
A beautiful reminder
Of the light above
That watches over us

You and me
Together or apart
Makes no difference to the light
It will shine just the same

Side by side
Or a million miles away
Light is still up there
Winking back at us

So trust
Trust that there is light out there
Besides us
But don’t trust in the stars
Trust the one who placed them in the sky
And knows each one by name
He knows you, too

He knows your name
He knows your scars
He knows your heart
He knows where you’ve fallen
And all those times you refused to give up
Always fighting
Fighting for light

So trust
Trust that he has a plan
His plans are good
And one day, you’ll see the beauty in it all

All the stars
All the sky
All the light
And all the night

Even darkness has a purpose
It allows the light to shine
The stars will remain
When morning takes their place
But the day that comes
Hides their light

Yet as the sun sets
And night arrives
Those same stars come out to greet us
If only we greet them too

So look up
Look up in the beautiful night sky
And trust
Trust in the one who made the stars
And the one who placed them there

He made your heart, too
He has a purpose and a plan
And he makes it all beautiful
According to heavenly time

Just wait for night to come
And you’ll see how light shines
A gentle reminder
Of all his goodness
Winking back
At me and you

It’s a dangerous invitation
That I’m holding out to you.
I display it like a rose
But really, underneath, it’s covered in thorns and dripping with my blood. 
I bear the scars from where this invitation has hurt me in the past. 
I’ve held this rose too tightly. 
I’ve been greedy. I’ve kept it to myself. 
I’ve crushed the petals because of my pride. 
I’ve stunted its growth and refused to allow it to be pruned. 
I can’t prune this rose myself. 
I can’t bring myself to cut what seems so beautiful in the moment. 
But it’s only through pruning that this rose will grow again. 

The pruning happens before the winter. Imagine what a rose must feel like in the middle of the winter—it’s cold, it’s bare, it’s raw, it’s open, and it’s vulnerable. Pruning must seem like the cruelest punishment for doing nothing wrong. 

But THEN, spring returns. LIFE begins to grow on and HOPE blooms aloud. 

And maybe, for once, I can let this rose go. Maybe I can finally share its beauty with someone else. Maybe I can share the thorns, too. Maybe I can trust that the pruning is necessary and even GOOD. Maybe I can believe that spring is just around the corner and love is blooming for me, too. 

The invitation to love and to receive love is a dangerous invitation. But maybe that’s exactly the step of faith God is calling me to. 

​
What “dangerous invitation” is God calling you to respond to with daring faith? 


I will step out boldly in faith. I will accept this dangerous invitation. I will walk forward with bold confidence. I will step out of the shadows with a renewed sense of hope. I will dance in the light with a joy that could only be heavenly. I will run and not grow weary. I will anchor on the shore and burn the ships, never looking back. I will forge ahead, even when the path seems unclear. I will be BOLD for the sake of the gospel and the kingdom coming. I will not fear for I know that my Father is not only watching, but he is with me. I will love and I will love and I will love and I will love again. 

God, I’m not ready for that. But that’s the mindset I want. Change my heart. Prune me. I’m asking for that. Asking for you to prune me is a dangerous invitation, too. And I'm ready to extend that. Your will be done. 

“Do you ever get tired of running?” 

A friend asked me this question today. I said no, because I really enjoy running. I explained that I get tired of doing the same workouts over and over again, but I don’t think I ever get tired of running itself. 

I haven’t really thought about that before. I repeated that question again in my head for the next several hours. I wanted to answer truthfully, so I kept questioning my initial answer until I was sure about it. 

I’ve decided that I don’t really get tired of running. Obviously I still get tired while running, but I don’t think I get tired of running itself. 

As I do with most things, I thought about how this might apply to my relationship with God. The question changed to “Do you ever get tired of running for God?” Once again, I have the same answer—no, because I really enjoy it. 

One of the greatest feelings in the whole world is feeling like I’m accomplishing my purpose in serving God and advancing his kingdom. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how to best align my priorities with God’s will. In the past, sometimes I’ve thought, “Oh, I’ll make time to serve God when my schedule allows it and I have the energy to do so.” 

But serving God isn’t something we should do only when we have the energy. Rather, our lives should be an act of service to God in everything we do. Whatever “race” God has equipped you to run, run for God (Colossians 3:23). I believe that when we run for the right reasons, God will strengthen us to keep running (Isaiah 40:31). 

As we run the race, we must remember WHY we do it. If you train and train but never race, you’re forgetting your purpose. In track, you can train all you want, but if you never race, you’ll never know how fast you are. The same is true for life. You can spend your whole life doing nice things and trying to be a good person, but if you’re not living for God, then you’re living without a purpose (1 Corinthians 9:24-25). 

We train to get faster. The training itself is necessary. But at some point, we have to race. We have to remind ourselves why we train. We have to remind ourselves that ultimately, we are doing this for God’s glory, to advance his kingdom, and to be faithful with the gifts he has given us. 

So RUN. RUN THE RACE. And RUN FOR GOD. 

As you run, don’t forget to enjoy it. Look back at how far you’ve come and be grateful for every step. Look forward to the finish line and remember why you do this. And encourage others along the way, that you might inspire them to run for God, too.